Anastasia Vitsky is hosting the Spanking romance round table discussion discussion this week. I thought I would join in. The topic is interesting to me. What about you?
Fantasy versus reality as it pertains to spanking.
Reality is the state of things as they exist.
It's what you see, hear, and experience.
Fantasy is an imagined or conjured up
sequence fulfilling a psychological need; daydream.
I often
think that in indulging our fantasy we understand what we desire more in real
life. Using our imagination we can make everything turn out perfectly. Many
successful people visualize the life they wish for. Is that unfulfilled fantasy,
or a way to create a more joyful life? We are often told to live the life we
wish. If we are sad the advice is to fake it until we make it. Is that
fantastical thinking? Maybe it is embracing the fantasy to create a more
satisfying reality.
Most of our
life we envision the future we will have.
ie… When I am this age I will do or have this…
“This” will be my career….I will marry…or not…have children….never have
children.
What about in spanking…TTWD….DD?
Spanking in
romantic relationships is/was always a part of my secret desire. I often fought
that wish tooth and nail in ‘real life’ and yet indulged my need in books
creating stories and dreams.
My Scotsman
is a spanker, but it isn’t really a DD relationship. In Our TTWD there is a bit
of reeling me in, irritation when I do things that are dangerous, stress relief,
and erotic spankings.
It isn’t
always like the stories. Sometimes it is. Fantasy is different from reality.
What is helpful is recognizing your relationship, who you are together and
separately.
Sometimes it is like
this:
Spankings
filled with frustration, impatience, and dissatisfaction.
Me: “No I don’t want this now, I am not in the
mood!”
“Wait! That
hurts”
“Sheesh what
a wimpy smack!”
“
Ooops!”
Him: “ENOUGH!!
Put your legs down, move your hands.”
Me: Not
saying here!
Other times it is like
this:
Spankings
filled with resolution, laughter and closeness.
Him: “Let’s
go into the room and have some fun….”
Me: “ Sigh.”
*Smile*
Him: “I
think you need some stress relief.”
Me: Like a
balloon slowly releasing air as all the stress leaves my body…
For me it is okay that it is not always perfect. That is real life.
I think fantasy is perfectly natural
and can bring us closer and enrich our lives. The problem is when we trade
fantasy for our reality. That can be harmful.
